A day I'd like to just tuck away in an envelope, squeeze into a bottle and toss it out to sea, never to be seen or heard from again.
It was one of those days that now all the kids are (finally!) asleep I am swallowed by guilt, and rightfully so.
I was a mean mom today.
I wish I could say I rose above it all. I wish I could say that despite my utter exhaustion {two of my children for some reason had no interest in sleeping last night}, when the children were being naughty and disobedient I simply took a deep breath and said in a lovingly tone, "Dears, there are consequences when you do that." I wish I could say that I patted Cade on the head and said calmly, "Oh darling, you will come out of it," when Cade moaned and complained for the 15th time that finding a Lego Set buried in the back yard and one under the carpet wasn't real. That in fact, he had dreamt it last night during the 3 mere hours he happened to sleep.
I have a dozen excuses of why it would have been perfectly rational for any sane mother to want to blow her gasket. Especially under the circumstances of how things went and continued to go today. But the reality is I'm an adult, and I'm supposed to keep my cool even when things aren't going how I'd like. I know better.
The irony in this is that one of the (many) issues I'm dealing with Cade at present is teaching him how to respond appropriately even when things don't go his way. Can't say that I was a great example today of how to be when things don't go your way. In fact, I was the perfect example of how NOT to be. I am beginning to wonder if he is just getting it from me. Like, all of "it."
Good heavens.
I was trying really hard to dig deep down and find that bit inside of me that would find this mini-mess courtesy of Ruby Dear adorable or funny....it just wasn't happening. Not today.
And here was the icing on the cake--- walking down the hall and finding this posted on Cade's door.
I'm particularly fond of my frowny face. Graphic design just may be in his future.
Here's to tomorrow.
1 comment:
Glad to know you're human. I love you! It's often when my kids are at their dad's that I wish I'd done things differently when they were here. I hope you're keeping Cade's note, along with the sweet ones he writes you!
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