Lucky 13

Today marked Cade's 13th day of kindergarten.

Kindergarten.

Kindergarten!

I have since attended my first Back to school night and PTA meeting. I found myself wandering the halls wondering how did I get here? Perhaps for most parents of school-aged children it's a smooth and natural transition, but for me, a woman who mentally considers herself at the ripe age of 17, I just find it difficult to believe I have already arrived at the stage of carpools, fundraisers and the notorious school picture day.

When did this little man:

Turn into this big boy?

I've reflected much over the last five years and have a few thoughts for Cade to read sometime down the road.....

Cade, you have always been my buddy. An unexpected surprise less than a year after your Dad and I were married, it feels like I haven't known anything else besides having you at my side. I used to joke that Heavenly Father had to send me a calm and mellow child or else I would have never finished school. It is true. You were a great baby who demanded little of my time and sat contentedly on those hardwood floors of our tiny rental student home while I clacked away at the computer working on homework. You came with me to class on many occassions, and even happily (though you had no choice in the matter) accompanied me on a door to door survey project for my senior capstone class. You were truly a sweet little companion. You have blessed my life with great purpose and profound meaning.

True, there are those days when I wonder what my life would have been like had you not come so soon. I've shed a tear or two in a selfish state of pity, longing to have had the White House experience. I've oozed with jealousy over old friends' victorious and successful job jaunts in Washington . But when the egocentric tears are dried and I come in to your room to steal a kiss from my sweet sleeping boy, I cannot deny the absolute truth that my life was changed for the better when you came into it. Your smile makes up a million times over for any successes from my missed career, and your hugs deplete any value of a paycheck I could have earned.

It has been such a privilege to be your mother. You are thoughtful, cautious and deep. I adore your enamoration with Joseph Smith, the prophet. You are a sweet big brother and it tickles me how you haven't stopped talking about all the other siblings you plan on having. It's been well over a year and you haven't given up on having a big brother. So cute!

I hope your first day was memorable. You were excited about the decorations in the kitchen. And what can be better than toys from the Dollar Tree? (Who says you have to know?)

When Savannah and I dropped you off on your first dayof school, I wish I had remembered to wear my sunglasses. I couldn't help the moisture in my eyes, but I surprised myself and kept my emotions at bay. Watching you walk into the school was so surreal to me, I felt like I was dreaming. Having you gone in the afternoons makes me want to cherish the time I do have with you. Thank you so much for being such a sweet son. I hope to never disappoint you or let you down. You are my little rock.

Loves,

Mom

cade on his first day of school making one of his signature silly faces.