Dear Unknown Garbage Removal Company,
Thank you for dumping my garbage yesterday. I am not a paying customer but I sure would be if I knew who you were because my garbage man is mean and cranky and even chucked about 10 dirty diapers from my garbage can into my yard once. I thought I was going to have to wait until next week for my cans to get dumped since I was too late putting them out there on Monday. I looked out the window Tuesday morning to see my cans empty and upside down! Bless you, kind garbage person, whoever you are. Bless you.
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Dear Mall Santa:
Thank you for telling my son to make sure he picks up all his toys, books, and clothes. He listens to you, not me, so that went over really well. I also appreciate you telling him to make sure to be nice and share with his little sister. My favorite line was when you told him I had one of the cleanest rooms back when I was a little girl (my parents remember otherwise). That was a great one. As a parent, I need all the support I can get.
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Dear T-Mobile mall kiosk worker dude,
Thank you for your apology. Honestly I didn't even hear you swear when I was walking by with my kids, so when you approached me and apologized I thought that was pretty cool. Most teenagers (and adults) don't think twice when they let vulgar language roll off their tongues in the presence of little ones.
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Dear Kyle,
ARE YOU KIDDING ME!!!? You really took off with EVERY SINGLE ONE of the rechargable double-A's?? Don't we have like 10 of them? The kids were being really cute this afternoon and I wanted to take a video of them only to find my camera and the battery drawer completely robbed of all batteries. Do you seriously think you're going to need THAT much battery power to document your hunting trip? You could have at least left me 2 for my own camera. You're so grounded.
5 comments:
LOVE IT! and If i were you I would ground him too; but he might like it be ware. ;)
Come on, watching hours of hunting footage is riveting! (Especially for those who weren't on the trip.)
Maybe while he's gone you should have a lock installed on "your" drawer. Just a thought... :)
I love your open letters. I may have to try that sometime. As for the batteries, let me give you a little grandfatherly wisdom (from your very own grandfather). We were discussing the lack of pens and pencils in our house one day and he said he had the same problem once but not any longer. He said he just kept buying more of them. Now I realize that rechargeable batteries are more expensive than pens and pencils, but the same logic applies. Go out and buy some more. If you run out of those, buy even more. Of course we are supposing that if you had twenty or thirty of them Kyle would not take all of them. Next time you're here, take a look in our pen drawer -- we don't run out of pens and pencils any more. Wait, now that I think of it we don't run out of pencils. Pens I sometimes have to dig for. Time to get another bag of 20.
Sweetie,
I put 8 AA batteries in the "battery drawer" so that you wouldn't run out. And, I hid 4 of the rechargeable batteries because I don't want you to lose them.
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